KerryLurch (1)

By Thomas Madison, Powdered Wig Society

At a ceremony announcing some guy named Shriek as special representative to Muslim communities, Secretary of State Lurch took the opportunity to plug the Obama administration’s global warming initiative, and to emphasize to the three people in the audience that it is OUR (America’s) “duty” to correct global warming, for the sake of the Muslims who are cutting our heads off.

The partial transcript of Lurch’s remarks follows:
“Our fates are inextricably linked on any number of things that we must confront and deal with in policy concepts today. Our fates are inextricably linked on the environment. For many of us, respect for God’s creation also translates into a duty to protect and sustain His first creation: Earth, the planet. Before God created man, He created Heavens and Earth. Confronting climate change is, in the long run, one of the greatest challenges that we face, and you can see this duty or responsibility laid down in scriptures, clearly, beginning in Genesis. And Muslim-majority countries are among the most vulnerable. Our response to this challenge ought to be rooted in a sense of stewardship of Earth. And for me and for many of us here today, that responsibility comes from God.”

My notes from the speech….

1.  It is good that two men named “Lurch” and “Shriek” can meet on the great stage of life. I’m sure DreamWorks is working on a movie script as I write.

2. Judging by the look on Shriek’s face at the beginning of the video, he and Lurch shared more than a stage, like maybe a pre-appearance joint in the dressing room.

3. I found Lurch’s comment “Earth, THE PLANET” interesting. I already knew that Earth is a planet, but maybe I am just extra smart.