Powdered Wig Society

By Thomas Madison

A group of teens, apparently playing the “knockout” game, chose the wrong victim, 60-year old Beulah Montgomery, who shot and killed two of the assailants after being punched.

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Montgomery, who was walking home after purchasing lottery tickets, says a group of seven teens approached her. She thought they were going to attempt to steal her purse, in which she kept a handgun, which she has always carried since having been mugged once before. She claims that when a second teen attempted to punch her, she reached for the gun in her purse, shooting one teen in the chest, and firing again, hitting another in the abdomen. Both teens died as a result of their injuries.

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“All I could feel was pain and I said to myself I had made it to 60 and I wanted to at least see 61. Then I started praying and I asked the Lord to guide my hands,” Montgomery says.

“Its a shame you can’t walk through your own neighborhood where you are supposed to feel safe without being assaulted and mistreated,” she continues. “I purchased the gun hoping I would never have to use it, but I’m glad to still be in the land of the living.”

Police are not releasing the names of the teen assailants, due to their age, but are confirming that the two teens who were shot both died as a result of their gun shot wounds. Police are still looking for the other teens involved in the assault. Witnesses claim the assailants ran and scattered after Ms. Montgomery opened fire. Montgomery, who has no prior arrests, has not been charged, but was detained and later released.

This is just another episode in what seems to be a string of similar incidents involving the “knockout” game, which are occurring all over the United States where teens choose what they believe to be a defenseless victim and attempt to knock that victim out with a single punch.

Karma is a bitch. Good riddance of a couple of worthless thug cockroaches who would even consider punching an elderly woman just for fun. Too bad Beulah didn’t get the other five.