by Thomas Madison

Have you ever seen a western movie where the perennial snake oil salesman comes rolling into town to hoodwink, I mean sell his wares, only to be met by another snake oil salesman, already there, scamming, I mean educating the crowd, so they set up opposite one another, competing to see who can separate more fools from more money?

Yeah, me neither, but wouldn’t it make a great Gunsmoke or Bonanza episode? Can you see Hoss Cartwright rubbing the elixir all over his belly, completely convinced that he will lose fifty pounds by sunrise? Or Little Joe applying liberal amounts to his member? Hey, the salesman swore it would work! It’s tough being called “Little” Joe.

We now have a similar real life sitcom on the global stage. I have named it “The Als.” The title characters are Al “Global Warming” Gore (hereinafter referred to as GW) and Al Jazeera, the popular Arab/Muslim media voice of the Middle East, which has expanded its Muslim propaganda, I mean its operation, to America in the hopes of snatching a chunk of the lucrative American media market. The two are embroiled in a nasty legal battle involving tens of millions of dollars in an escrow payment, not chump change, even to Middle Eastern oil magnates.

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As it turns out in our story, GW ripped, I mean sold his Current TV network to Al Jazeera, backed by the Qatari government. Al Jazeera had no problem ponying up the coin GW was asking, a cool $500 million, part of which was escrowed, to be paid later. As the drama unfolds we will learn the exact conditions of release of the escrow funds. Here is the rub. GW wants the money he screwed, I mean was promised, and Al Jazeera, believing they were sold a lemon, does not want to pay. The plot thickens.

Is it conceivable that Al “Global Warming” Gore would mislead, defraud, or cheat anyone? Ha! Of course not! The very thought is preposterous. Have Middle Easterners ever been anything less than completely honest and reputable in their business and other dealings with parties from the west? OF COURSE NOT! A ridiculous notion!

According to Nielsen, Al Jazeera had 17,000 viewers during prime time since the beginning of 2014 through the end of May. They are not exactly “killing it.” That is 1% of the Fox audience in the same time slot. Who knew red-blooded Americans wouldn’t be completely receptive to Al Jazeera?

Based on those numbers Al Jazeera should net in the neighborhood of $21 a week in advertising revenue, hardly a great return on a $500 million investment.

My advice to Al Jazeera – do whatever it takes to get the rights to “The Als.” It is going to be a blockbuster! AND YOU’RE IN IT!!!!